After a while, things became more serious. I guess serious is the wrong thing for the two of us..
On my 16th birthday, he bought me a dozen roses and a teddy bear. Pretty darn cute. I seriously felt like the luckiest girl in the world. Then things took a turn for the worst..
We started fighting and fighting. We fought about nothing! I found myself just picking fights because he told me he would be on xbox at 8:00 and it was 8:01. It got to the point where we couldnt even talk or have a conversation without fighing. But throough all of those fights, he never left. He stayed. He never actually fought back with me. Some times it was just me fighting with myself. I lost my mind and all i though was "things would be easier if he was here..". Every once in a while i would have what i like to call "realizations", which is just me realizing how much i messed up. I would send long messages to him at ungodly hours just saying sorry and explaing how much i messed up.
January 19th 2011 12:42am
" I'm sitting in my room crying.. Can't really believe that it took me this long to realize everything..
I'm sorry.
I treat you horrible, I take jokes too seriously or maybe just too far, I make fun of you, I don't ask how you day was or anything, I don't care about the conversation or take it seriously unless it's about me..
I'm so sorry..
You deserve more that I give you. I promise that this time I will pull up my socks..
Maybe I'm lacking sleep.. I miss you.. Maybe I'm just crazy.. Who knows anymore?!
Anyways, I have never met a person who is so much like me, than you! It's like we just have this crazy connection.. Its like you... You get me. I love that. Your my best friend. I trust you, I can tell you anything and you won't judge me. You make me laugh so hard that I have water come outta my nose, my ribs hurt and I can hardly breathe! I'd kill for you.. I feel like I met you for a reason.. Like there is a purpose for it.. Like, I'm supposed to protect you from something.. I don't know.. My mom loves the fact that I met you.. I'm always smiling and you have this effect on me.. Goodness.. Case, you know me like the back of your hand.. I miss you lately.. We hardly have time to talk, it drives me crazy.. Believe it or not, I love those cute smart-ass comments, those blonde moments you get once in a while, the big words you use that I don't understand, when you steal my words, but mostly, your uber duber complete fails at talking.. Makes me laugh just thinking about it.. Haha! Even your laugh is enough to put a smile on my face, and I love that the most.."
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